There’s a tricky thing I’ve learned about marriage.
And that tricky thing is, once you’re married and living together and seeing each other every day, it can be easy to stop dating. It can be easy to let life together substitute dating each other, and go through the motions without intentionally setting aside quality time.
Think about it: dating isn’t exclusively for unmarried couples. Dating is simply scheduling time to spend with someone you care about. A married couple should never stop dating, because they haven’t reached the end of their journey together. Love should always be given the opportunity to grow. So it’s important to be intentional about spending time with your spouse.
Now, I’ll be the first to tell you that dating as a married couple is different than dating prior to marriage. One of the reasons for this is finances. Many young married couples, Seth and I included, are trying to pay off student loans or other debt and hesitate to spend too much money on other, unnecessary items.
But let me tell you two things. One, dating doesn’t have to break the bank.
And two, dating your spouse is not unnecessary.
If you want to continue to grow together, learn together, love together, pray together, and build together, you need to continue to spend time together.
So here are five tried-and-true date ideas you can use to surprise your spouse – and all of these ideas cost little to no money!
1. Take a trip to your own makeshift drive-in movies!
Or, you could go to a real drive-in movie theater – they’re typically not very expensive. But it can also be fun to set up your own personal drive-in experience, either indoors or outdoors!
Pile up blankets and pillows in your living room, outside under the stars, or even in the back of a pick-up truck. Pick up a DVD from your local library or Redbox and grab some of your favorite snacks from the grocery store. You can play the movie on the TV, a laptop, or even a projector if you have one! This is one of Seth and I’s favorite dates.
2. Go for a sunset hike with a picnic at the end.
Hiking is Seth and I’s go-to activity when we have some free time. Add in a beautiful sunset and a delicious picnic supper, and you’ve got an easy, romantic date night.
Research your area for a short hike with a good lookout at the end. Make sure the lookout faces the west so you’ll be able to see the sunset.
Pick a clear evening, pack a picnic meal in a backpack or light cooler bag, and head out on your adventure! If you prefer mornings, you could do a sunrise hike instead.
3. Have some fun at a thrift store.
Go to a local thrift store. Split up and have each of you put together a complete outfit for the other person to try on. It can be an outfit you actually like, or one that’s mismatched and completely bizarre (in my opinion, the sillier the better!).
You can either just try the outfits on, or buy them and wear them out in public, to a restaurant or the mall. Couples that laugh together stay together!
4. Stargaze together.
Head to the library and pick up a book about stars. Then, on a clear night, drive out to the middle of nowhere, away from lights and buildings and commotion.
Bring a blanket, lay out under the stars, and try to identify some constellations.
Seth and I used to do this a lot when we lived in Ohio, where the flat land makes the sky seem vast and unending. We’d often marvel at the beauty of our God, when you see the immense nature of His creation in the stars.
5. Experiment with a new recipe.
I’m not a huge fan of cooking, and Seth doesn’t love it either. But once in a while we’ll cook together, and that makes it a whole lot more enjoyable.
Look on Pinterest and find a recipe that looks incredible, but a bit more challenging than what you’d normally cook. Then, head out to the store, pick up your ingredients, and conquer it together!
Enjoy your creation (or pick up a pizza, if it turns out to be a Pinterest fail) with a romantic in-house candlelight dinner.
6. Slow down your weekly visit to the grocery store.
Sometimes, money isn’t the obstacle between you, your spouse, and a great date. Time is. There’s work to be finished, laundry to be folded, dishes to be washed, and when you put it all together, there just isn’t time left for a date night.
If that’s where you’re at right now, be creative. Even a chore can become a date, if you make it one. (Not all the time… dates with real quality time are still really important.)
For example, next time you go grocery shopping, go together. Take it slow. Walk down all the aisles. Learn all of your spouse’s favorites: favorite candy, favorite ice cream, favorite freezer meal, favorite spice, favorite childhood snack, favorite type of pasta. Go for those obscure facts you might not know about each other, even if you feel like you already know everything.
More than anything, even if you don’t do any of these dates, be intentional.
Be intentional about making time for each other.
Be intentional about asking questions and tuning into the other person’s emotions.
Be intentional about loving.
Be intentional about recognizing your spouse as a onederfully created child of God.
And never forget that you are also a onederfully created child of God, made beautiful and perfect by your Creator.
Love,
Becca
